Political Memes

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has banned the use of red dye No. 3 in food, beverages, and ingested drugs, more than 30 years after scientists discovered links to cancer in animals. What do you think?
The post FDA Bans Red Food Dye appeared first on The Onion.

CAIRO—Finally solving the mystery of how such architectural wonders could have been built with primitive tools in ancient times, Egyptologists from Cambridge University announced Thursday that they had unearthed depictions of the simple ramps and levers that aliens used to build the pyramids at Giza. “Shortly after traveling to Earth in their quantum-drive spaceships, extraterrestrials […]
The post Egyptologists Unearth Depictions Of Simple Ramps, Levers Aliens Used To Build Pyramids  appeared first on The Onion.

President-elect Donald Trump has expressed his interest in buying Greenland, an idea he first floated back in 2019. The Onion examines the pros and cons of the U.S. acquiring the country.  PRO: New Indigenous people to wrong CON: Feels immoral to do anything that makes the Danes richer PRO: Would increase domestic supply of ice […]
The post Pros And Cons Of Buying Greenland appeared first on The Onion.

Catherine, the Princess of Wales, revealed her cancer is in remission about 10 months after announcing her diagnosis, saying in a post, “It is a relief to now be in remission and I remain focussed on recovery.” What do you think?
The post Kate Middleton Reveals Cancer In Remission appeared first on The Onion.

SAN DIEGO—As they shooed a herd of giraffes into a nearby bathroom, workers told reporters Friday that they were frantically scrambling to hide all of the San Diego Zoo’s animals ahead of a visit from the landlord. “He texted an hour ago saying he was dropping in to check the garbage disposal, so we’ve been running […]
The post City Zoo Scrambles To Hide Animals Ahead Of Landlord Visit appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Watching in horror as the hulking feline pounced on the commander-in-chief scampering across the White House lawn, officials confirmed Friday that President Joe Biden was batted around by a relentless giant cat. “Hey, kitty, kitty—please, no!” said Biden, who looked desperately over his shoulder in search of his Secret Service detail and yelped out in […]
The post Biden Batted Around By Giant Cat appeared first on The Onion.

LOS ANGELES—In a chaotic scene that saw young people screaming and ducking for cover in the moments after the hip-hop star was served from a passing vehicle, witnesses confirmed Thursday morning that Kendrick Lamar had been hit with a drive-by summons outside an L.A. nightclub. “It all happened so fast—one minute Kendrick was standing around […]
The post Kendrick Lamar Hit With Drive-By Summons Outside L.A. Nightclub appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Declining to attend any event or go anywhere at all until 2030, former first lady Michelle Obama confirmed  Thursday that she would be skipping the rest of the decade. “I’ve decided to just go ahead and excuse myself for the rest of the 2020s,” said Obama, speaking to reporters through an intercom by the front […]
The post Michelle Obama Confirms She Will Skip Rest Of Decade appeared first on The Onion.

A ceasefire deal has been reached to end 15 months of fighting in the Gaza Strip, with the agreement also freeing dozens of hostages held in Gaza as well as Palestinians in Israeli jails. What do you think?
The post Israel, Hamas Reach Ceasefire Deal appeared first on The Onion.