Biden, Trump Make Separate Border Visits

Biden, Trump Make Separate Border Visits

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

Joe Biden and Donald Trump took competing visits to the U.S.-Mexico border yesterday, both in an effort to show voters that their stance on immigration is the better one, as the increase in immigration during the last four years has become a primary concern in the 2024 election. What do you think?Read more…

Apple Reveals Vision Pro Has Been Autonomous Vehicle All Along

Apple Reveals Vision Pro Has Been Autonomous Vehicle All Along

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

CUPERTINO, CA—Stunning fans and investors who had long assumed the company’s electric car project was dead, CEO Tim Cook took the stage at an Apple keynote event Friday to announce the Apple Vision Pro has been an autonomous vehicle all along. “Not only are plans for an Apple electric vehicle not canceled—it’s been on…Read more…

Americans Guess Who Will Replace Mitch McConnell

Americans Guess Who Will Replace Mitch McConnell

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

Now in his seventh term in the U.S. Senate, Mitch McConnell (R-KY) announced that he would step back from his position as minority leader later this year. Here, Americans give their best guess for who will replace the long-serving conservative lawmaker.Read more…

This Week's Most Viral News: March 1, 2024

This Week’s Most Viral News: March 1, 2024

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

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Sustainable Hospital Switches To Reusable Canvas Blood Bags

Sustainable Hospital Switches To Reusable Canvas Blood Bags

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

ESCONDIDO, CA—Instituting a sustainability policy intended to make the facility more eco-friendly, Sacred Heart Medical Center announced Friday that it was switching to reusable canvas blood bags. “We have begun phasing out traditional plastic blood bags and replacing them with an alternative that is made from…Read more…

Zelensky Challenges Putin To Settle Ukraine War On The Dance Floor

Zelensky Challenges Putin To Settle Ukraine War On The Dance Floor

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

GENEVA—In an impassioned speech at a peace summit hosted in Switzerland, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky issued a striking challenge to his Russian counterpart Thursday, inviting Vladimir Putin to settle the war between their two nations on the dance floor. “After two years of fighting we have reached a…Read more…

Women Explain How They’d Like To Have Their Bodies Restricted Next

Women Explain How They’d Like To Have Their Bodies Restricted Next

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

Since the fall of Roe vs. Wade, women’s reproductive rights, including the right to abortion, hormonal birth control, and in vitro fertilization, have been severely restricted across the United States. The Onion asked women how they’d like to have their bodies restricted next, and this is what they said.Read more…

Tums Introduces New Deep-Dish Antacid Pizza

Tums Introduces New Deep-Dish Antacid Pizza

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

ST. LOUIS—In an effort to introduce a more satisfying version of their calcium tablets, Tums debuted a new deep-dish antacid pizza Friday that offers eight piping-hot slices of digestion aid. “Tums Antacid Deep-Dish Pizza features a two-inch-thick authentic Chicago-style crust of calcium carbonate topped with loads of…Read more…

Authorities Called In Glasgow ‘Willy Wonka’ Experience Scam

Authorities Called In Glasgow ‘Willy Wonka’ Experience Scam

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

Lured by AI-generated images of an immersive Willy Wonka Experience in Glasgow, families across Scotland bought a total of 850 tickets to an event hosted by the House of Illuminati only to arrive at a half-empty warehouse in a shock that left parents outraged, children crying, and police called to the scene. What do yo…Read more…

Nation Just Wants Shitty Version That Doesn’t Last Long For Cheap

Nation Just Wants Shitty Version That Doesn’t Last Long For Cheap

By Memes LOL | March 1, 2024

WASHINGTON—Requesting something useless and disposable that wouldn’t break the bank, the American populace announced Friday that it just wanted a shitty version that didn’t last long for cheap. “We definitely would like to have one of those things, but only if it costs almost nothing, breaks immediately, and is…Read more…