20 Lamest Jokes Ever

Sometimes jokes can be so lame that they are actually makes us laugh. We have put together a list of the worst jokes we could find. Strap in for some lame laughs!

A Buddhist walks up to a hotdog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."

Everyone chuckles, and the vendor makes the dog. The Buddhist hands him a twenty, the vendor pockets it & moves on to the next customer. The Buddhist complains, "Hey where's my change." And the Vendor replies, "Ah, change comes from within."

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.

How did the dentist become a brain surgeon?

His hand slipped.

What do you call a Labrador that becomes a magician?

A Labracadabrador!

Olympic gymnast walks into a bar, she doesn't get a medal.

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage.

"No thanks, I'm traveling light."

A helium molecule walks in afterwards. The bellhop asks if he needs any help.

Helium doesn't react.

Which side of the zebra has the most stripes?

The outside.

What do you do when you see a spaceman?

You park your car, man.

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

Three tomatoes are walking down the street. A papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. The baby tomato starts falling behind so the papa tomato squishes him and says, "Ketchup."

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?

A thesaurus.

A horse walks into a bar. He walks up to the bartender and says "Give me a beer." The bartender is stunned, so he heads to the back of the bar to speak with the owner.

"Hey boss" he says, "there's a horse in the bar asking for a beer."

The bar owner pauses for a second, then replies "Well then give him one, but charge him double. Horses don't know the price of beer." So the bartender heads back out front and hands the horse a beer.

"You know," says the barkeep, "we don't get many horses around here."

To which the horse replies, "At these prices I'm not surprised."

A pirate walks into a bar. He's got the eye patch, the peg leg, the hook and the parrot on the shoulder. He also has a ship's wheel sticking out of the zipper of his pants. The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel?" The pirate says, "Arrr, it's drivin' me nuts!"

Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors? Because, if it had 4 doors it would be chicken sedan.

A length of rope walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says "get out, we don't serve ropes in here!" The rope goes outside and cuts himself in half and ties his two sections together. Not pleased with his appearance, he takes a comb and combs out his ends. He walks back into the bar and the bartender says "hey, aren't you that rope I just kicked out?" And the rope replied "no, I'm a frayed knot."

There you have it folks, the lamest jokes we could find. If you enjoy jokes feel free to explore the rest of our website which has thousands of other jokes ready to tickle your funny bone!